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A Time To Heal
Linda Goodnight
Only one person knows why Kat Thatcher left her Oklahoma hometown ten years ago.Why she ran to the city and became a workaholic doctor. Why she put off marriage…indefinitely. And that person is now staring her in the face on her first day back in town!Seth Washington is as handsome as ever. Way too available. And wanting to talk about the past–which Kat prefers to leave alone. Seth insists the Lord is on their side and always was. Kat's starting to believe, but will that be enough for love?
“I’d forgotten how much fun we used to have.”
“One bad event can destroy a lot of good memories.”
Kat’s face closed up and she looked away, smile gone. Seth wished he’d kept his mouth shut.
“Hey, look at that sky.”
“I see Venus,” Kat said, focused upward, and Seth was relieved to have skirted the issue that always drove her away. They had never talked about it. The topic of their mistake, their shame, their loss and guilt was like a wall between them.
Was he falling for Kat all over again? Was that what was happening here?
The haunting cry of a whip-poor-will sounded in the woods behind them. He understood the loneliness in that call. Loving had cost him too much, but not loving left him empty.
And under the circumstances, he didn’t know what to do about either one.
LINDA GOODNIGHT
A romantic at heart, Linda Goodnight believes in the traditional values of family and home. Writing books enables her to share her certainty that, with faith and perseverance, love can last forever and happy endings really are possible.
A native of Oklahoma, Linda lives in the country with her husband, Gene, and Mugsy, an adorably obnoxious rat terrier. She and Gene have a blended family of six grown children. A former elementary-school teacher, she is also a licensed nurse. When time permits, Linda loves to read, watch football and rodeo and indulge in chocolate. She also enjoys taking long, calorie-burning walks in the nearby woods. Readers can write to her at linda@lindagoodnight.com, or c/o Steeple Hill Books, 233 Broadway, Suite 1001, New York, NY 10279.
A Time To Heal
Linda Goodnight
“For I know the plans I have for you,”
declares the Lord.
“Plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you hope and a future.”
—Jeremiah 29:11
This one is for you, the faithful readers who buy
my books, who write me letters and e-mails filled
with sweet encouragement. I am grateful for every
single one of you. You are a blessing.
Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Epilogue
Questions For Discussion
Chapter One
“I’m never going back.”
Dr. Kathryn Thatcher lay in the wooden porch swing, one arm slung across her eyes, her weary body soaking up sun.
She hadn’t been outside in such a long time she’d likely suffer second-degree burn. But the old family home at Wilson’s Cove, Oklahoma, was tailor-made for lazing around, something the career-driven Dr. Thatcher never did. Until now.
Three days and counting since she’d asked her medical director for a leave of absence and walked out. In truth, she wanted to resign, but he’d talked her out of it. Didn’t matter. She was done, finished, through.
Too many dead kids would do that to a person.
“A few days’ rest and you’ll be ready to go again. You’re just tired.”
Kat’s sister, Susan Renfro, sat on the top step of the long wooden porch, fingers laced around one knee, short dark unruly curls gleaming in the sunlight. She’d gained more weight, something Kat was not about to mention, considering Susan had never lost the extra twenty pounds from Sadie’s birth four years ago. Three kids and a love for Southern comfort cooking had destroyed her sister’s former cheerleader body.
Who was she to talk? She’d added a few pounds, too, and her idea of exercise was running from one exam room to another.
“I’m more than tired, Suz,” Kat said, though she couldn’t deny the exhaustion. “Maybe I made a mistake. Maybe I wasn’t cut out for the medical profession.”
Memories of that last, terrible night pressed in. Kat shivered, still hearing the incessant rain hammering against the glass E.R. doors as ambulance after ambulance arrived, carrying victims from a five-car pileup on I-35. Thirty-six hours of blood and death, the worst of it being that all the fatalities were teenagers.
“A career in medicine is all you ever wanted, Kat. It’s who you are.”
Lately, Kat wasn’t sure who she was or what she wanted.
Her older sister meant well, but she had no idea what an E.R. physician’s life was like.
Like most girls in Wilson’s Cove, Susan married her high school sweetheart the summer after graduation and settled down around the 700 acre recreational lake, content to raise a family and take care of the family’s rental cabins. She’d never gone to college, much less spent years working eighty hours a week until she was a zombie inside and out. She’d also never had to bear the news to parents that their beautiful, fresh-faced sixteen-year-old would never graduate from high school.
“Becoming a doctor was all I wanted as a kid. I’m not a kid anymore.” She’d gone into medicine to save lives. Lately, all she’d done was sign death certificates.
“Then, what do you want?”
“I don’t know.” There was the truth. She wanted to be happy. She wanted to feel joy. She wanted some intangible something that lacked definition. But if she admitted as much, she’d get a sermon. To her sister, life revolved around faith in God. That was fine for Susan. Religion hadn’t worked so well for Kathryn. She and God had let each other down a long time ago.
“I’m being sued,” she said.
“For what?” Susan frowned and sat up straighter, ready to defend her baby sister. The sight warmed a cold spot inside of Kathryn. That was the great thing about family and one of the things she’d forgotten in her long absences from the cove.
“For being a doctor, I guess. I never even saw the patient, but I wrote and signed a discharge summary for his chart. Therefore, I am as liable for his death as the blood clot that killed him.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“Happens all the time.” Another reason she was back in Wilson’s Cove for good. She was tired of fighting the system.
“What are you going to do about it?”
“Nothing I can do except let the lawyers duke it out.” And sit by while her malpractice insurance jumped into yet another exorbitant bracket.
“Well, that’s just wrong.”
Kat agreed, resentment boiling up inside her like a geyser. But if she followed that train of thought, she’d have a stroke.
Closing her eyes, she tried not to think at all, a major problem for a woman whose mind never stopped churning. She was always thinking, always working, always planning. Sometimes she wanted to scream for her mind to shut up.
April was here and, oh, how she loved the wild Oklahoma spring. With iron determination, she concentrated on the sights and sounds, anything to wash away the memories of her work in Oklahoma City.
Lilacs and peach blossoms scented the air with gentle sweetness, and the hum of bees and other insects filled the afternoon. A butterfly hovered on one of Susan’s geranium pots, a splash of yellow on fuchsia. Spring meant new beginnings, new growth, the rebirth of nature after a long, hard winter. For a silly moment, Kat wished she could be a tulip or a daffodil, ready to burst into newness.
“Guess who I saw this morning?” Susan asked after a long period of silence.
“I give up,” Kat said, lazily opened her eyes to peer into Susan’s clear blue ones. “Who?”
With a Cheshire Cat grin, Susan tugged at the toe of Kat’s tennis shoe. “Seth Washington. He asked about you.”
Kathryn’s stomach quivered, and she sat up, pulling her foot away. Even though Susan had made a point of keeping her apprised of Seth’s life ever since he moved back to Wilson’s Cove last year, Kat tried never to think about the boy she’d loved in high school.
“How did he know I was here?”
“Oh, come on, Kat. This is Wilson’s Cove. Everyone in town knew you were home fifteen minutes after you stopped for gas at the Quick Mart.”
“Oh.” She’d almost forgotten the invisible information line that zinged from one side of the lake to the other, especially when the news concerned one of its own. The summer people came, camped, fished and left. But Kat’s family had been here long before Wilson’s Lake became a popular vacation spot, had owned most of the land at one time. The locals knew her, were proud of her, too, because she’d gone off to the big city to become a doctor.
Well, now she was back. Wonder what they’d think of that?
“Aren’t you curious about him?” Susan was relentless when she got something into her head. And Seth Washington seemed to be her favorite subject whenever she talked to her baby sister.
“No.” They’d had this conversation before.
Kat finished off an icy glass of Susan’s fresh lemonade to prove how uninterested she was. In the few times she’d been back to the cove, she’d made a pointed effort to avoid the new lake ranger. “Not interested.”
“Liar.” Her sister swatted Kat’s lily-white leg. “I’m going to tell you anyway. Donna down at the Quick Mart says he’s divorced. Has been for a long time, though he kept that quiet at first. He probably never got over you.”
Kat made a rude noise in the back of her throat. “Don’t be silly. That was years ago. He married someone else.”
“So? He’s divorced now. Rumor says his wife left him for another man, and that’s why he quit the Houston police force and moved back to the cove.”
The rumor made Kat’s chest ache. Seth was a great guy, or had been when she’d known him. He deserved better. “Gossip is a sin, sister dear.”
For a second, Kat wished she hadn’t mentioned sin. She didn’t want to get Susan started on the church thing. They’d grown up in a Christian home and Susan had stayed true to her faith. Science and experience had taken Kat in a different direction, and the difference had caused more than one lively discussion between the sisters.
But Susan didn’t go there this time. Instead she stuck out her tongue. “It’s not gossip. It’s the truth. And you want to hear everything I have to say about Seth Washington whether you admit it or not. Even the part about how good he looks in his lake ranger’s uniform.”
Kat rolled her eyes heavenward, though the image of Seth in any kind of uniform was one she’d carried since first hearing he’d become a cop in Houston. But she and Seth had made their decision all those years ago and their painful history did not bear rehashing.
“Did you know his mama has Alzheimer’s? She’s in a nursing home in Tulsa.”
“Oh, Suz.” Seth and his mother had always been close. No doubt her illness was the real driving force behind his return to the cove. “That’s awful.”
“Seth drives up to see her every week. I’ve heard Virgie doesn’t even remember him.”
Kat fought against a tide of empathy and lost. The boy she remembered would be devastated by such a loss. She couldn’t bear to think about it. Not now. Not when she didn’t want to think about Seth at all.
“Is there any more lemonade in the fridge?” she asked, and then pushed off the swing to saunter inside the house, letting the old-fashioned storm door clap shut resoundingly behind her. Even then she could hear her smart-aleck sister’s tsk-tsking.
A moment later Susan was in the kitchen beside her.
Braced for more Seth updates, Kat was slightly deflated when Susan said, “Are you still as inept in the kitchen as always?”
“Yep. But I’m sharp with a scalpel. Could probably surgically dissect a chicken for you.” She made a slashing motion with her hand, à la Zorro. Then she paused in midslash and cocked her head toward the noise coming from the back of the house. “What’s that racket?”
“Probably Shelby and Jon fighting over the remote.”
“Oh, that’s right. Today’s Saturday. I forgot about the kids being here.”
Her sister gave her a long, sad look. “Do you realize how pathetic that is? To forget about kids? To forget about the man you once loved? But to want to leave the profession that you gave all that up for?”
“Don’t start in, Susan. If I’d wanted kids or a husband I would have stayed here in Wilson’s Cove instead of fighting my way into medical school.”
But she had wanted those things. Seth. Children. Susan didn’t know nearly as much as she thought she did. Regardless of the feminist movement and all the other hype, Kathryn had found out the hard way that a woman couldn’t have everything.
“What are you going to do if you don’t go back to medicine?”
Kat shrugged as she reached into the fridge for the big round pitcher filled with lemonade. Freshly sliced lemons bobbed like tiny yellow lifejackets.
She thunked the pitcher onto the scarred pedestal table. Gnaw marks along one edge served as permanent souvenirs from one of the kids’ teething episodes. Knowing Susan, Kat figured she’d never let this table go because of those teeth marks.
“I have investments,” she said in answer to Susan’s question. “Maybe I’ll open a business.”
“Here?” Susan snorted. She took out a bowl and tossed in a half-dozen fat potatoes. “Like what? A bait shop? A snow-cone stand?”
Kat stared at the Colonial-blue corner cabinet, pretending to give the suggestions serious thought. “I haven’t had a snow cone in a long time. I use to love those things.”
“Business is lousy in winter.” They both laughed and Susan said, “The convenience store on Main is up for sale.
“Hmm. No. Too inconvenient.”
They laughed again, feeling silly. She and Susan hadn’t kidded around this way in forever. No wonder she was depressed and burned out. She had no life.
“Here.” Susan shoved the bowl of potatoes at her. “If you’re such a hotshot with a scalpel you should be able to peel these for dinner while I put together the chicken casserole.”
Kat groaned for effect before setting to work. Actually, she didn’t mind helping in the kitchen as long as Susan didn’t ask her to fry chicken or make gravy. Her idea of a home-cooked meal was microwavable Lean Cuisine. The rest of the time she lived on machine sandwiches, and doughnuts left in the doctor’s lounge by drug reps looking to make brownie points.
Other than knowing medicine, Dr. Thatcher was pretty much useless, a grim reality considering her decision to leave the field behind.
Susan, on the other hand, was Miss Susie Homemaker in the flesh. She loved to cook, sew and constantly tried out new ideas for renovating the old farmhouse or the rental cabins. Last year she’d gone into Colonial mode and painted all the cabinets blue. Currently, she was trying her hand at faux finishes. The woman never stopped creating and beautifying the world. It was who she was, a fact that kept Kat from complaining about Susan’s attempts to “fix up” her life in the same way she fixed up houses.
Kathryn took a fat potato from the bowl, challenging herself to peel the spud in one long curly piece.
“I’m moving over to the cabin tomorrow,” she said.
“Did you ask Danny?” Susan’s husband was in real estate and handled most of the rental property around the lake.
“It’s my house.” She lifted a shoulder to scratch her itchy nose. “Why would I have to ask Danny?”
“Because you told him to rent it out. You’re never here.”
“I’m here now.” Kat caught her bottom lip under her top teeth and stilled the flow of irritation. She had told Danny to rent the place. No use getting huffy now. “Is my cabin rented out?”
“Yes, it is.” Slowly wrapping an onion in plastic wrap, Susan turned to look at her. “Is staying with us so bad?”
“You have three kids, Suz. This place is Grand Central Station.”
“But the house is big and roomy. And you could use some TLC from the people who love you and can put up with your arrogant moods.”
“I am neither arrogant nor moody.”
“Ho-ho! And wet dogs don’t stink. This is your big sister you’re talking to. I know all your secrets.”
The thought grabbed Kat right in the center of her chest and squeezed. No, Susan didn’t know one of her secrets. But Seth Washington did.
Kat loved her sister and the noisy bunch of nieces and nephew, but she also needed her own space. After dinner she made excuses and went for a walk to clear her head.
The family home rested more than two hundred yards back from Wilson’s Lake, but the water sounds and smells carried on the breeze. A familiar trail led through the trees and underbrush to the shoreline. Still another meandered to the east toward Kat’s cabin. Without conscious decision, she headed in that direction, curious to see who resided there in her absence. After all the effort she’d put into making the cabin a lovely retreat, Kat didn’t want to live anywhere else. Maybe she could convince the renter to find another place now that she was home.
As she traversed the woods, a thousand other thoughts plagued her. She worried about the effect her abrupt departure from the medical center would have on the other staff members, about the patients she’d turned over to other physicians, but most of all she wondered about the future. As clichéed as it sounded, today was the first day of the rest of her life, and she didn’t know what to do with it. She’d worked too long and too hard to remain idle for any extended period of time.
The old trail hadn’t been used in a while and the blackberry thickets were taking over. Thorny vines, sprinkled with tiny white flowers, reached out and grabbed her exposed legs. She slowed long enough to direct the growth elsewhere, mentally marking the spot for later in the summer when black, juicy berries could become a cobbler. In Susan’s capable hands, of course. Certainly not hers.
As she rounded into the clearing at the side of Kat’s Cabin, as the family had dubbed the two-bedroom cottage, her spirits lifted. Though she spent little time here, she felt better knowing the small A-frame was available when she needed a break. And boy, did she need the familiar comfort of home right now.
The air was alive with spring smells and sounds, but her house was quiet. A bright-red riding mower was parked beneath a drooping mimosa tree in the front yard. Someone had recently cut the grass, but that someone was nowhere to be seen.
Kat craned her head toward the backyard where the fishing dock extended far into the lake. No one there, either.
She knocked and the action felt odd given this was her house. When no one answered, she reached under the top porch step. When her fingers touched the plastic holder, she grinned. The key was right where she’d left it.
Telling herself that she only wanted to check the place out, to make sure the renter was taking care of her property, Kat opened the door and stepped inside.
Nothing much had changed. Her living room furniture, a comfortable mix of favorite pieces, had been moved around to accommodate a big-screen TV. A basket of folded laundry rested on the couch and several magazines were stacked neatly on her maple end table.
Out of curiosity she moved closer, saw the laundry was mostly men’s shirts and socks, and the top magazine was a recent edition of True Crime. So, a guy had rented her cabin. At least he was fairly neat.
She wandered into the kitchen, found the room tidy and clean except for a peanut butter jar on the counter and a butter knife and a glass in the sink. Though she’d had no qualms about entering the cabin, she opted against climbing the steps to the loft bedrooms. A bedroom was personal and private.
Crossing to the rounded row of windows that looked from the country kitchen toward the lake, she peered out. The lake was serene; the fading sun glowed orange and gold across the glassy surface. In the distance a pair of boat fishermen stood silhouetted against the sky, fishing rods arched into the shimmering water. Kat breathed in slowly, deeply, refreshed just to be here. There was something so serene and calming about Wilson’s Lake.
Susan was right. Kathryn needed time to rest and unwind. And there was no place better on earth than her own private, isolated cabin. Whoever lived here would simply have to move. Maybe she could make him a deal. She was willing to help him find a better place and pay the difference in rents. Her mental and emotional health was worth the expense. Money wasn’t a problem. She had plenty of that. As a kid, she’d dreamed of the day she could say those words. But now that she had money, she never had time.
Well, she was taking the time.
Suddenly her tranquility was shattered. The front door banged opened, slammed against the wall and reverberated on its hinges.
Kat’s heart behaved in much the same way. It slammed hard against her rib cage.
A powerful voice yelled, “Put your hands in the air! Do it now!”
Kat spun around to explain, but the words froze on her lips. The biggest gun she’d ever seen pointed straight at her. Her mouth went dry and her knees began to tremble. She slowly raised both hands.
“Don’t shoot,” she squeaked, afraid to move, afraid to take her eyes off that deadly weapon. Had Danny rented her cottage to a serial killer? She started babbling. “I’m sorry. I should have waited for you to get home. I just…”
“Kat?” That quick, the man lowered the gun and stepped from the shadowed living room into the kitchen sunlight.
Kat’s wobbly knees almost gave way.
Standing before her, looking fierce and manly and more ruggedly handsome than she remembered was Seth Washington.
Chapter Two
“What do you think you’re doing?” Grim-faced, Seth slid the Glock into his back waistband. “I could have shot you.”
He stood glaring at her, stance wide, shoulders tense as if he still might.
How did she respond to that?
Blood pounded in her ears, and the metallic taste of fear burned in the back of her throat. Over the years she’d treated any number of gunshot wounds, and she knew the damage a weapon of that caliber could do to the human body. But she’d never had one pointed in her direction. A shudder passed over her.
Seth must have noticed her distress. He stalked across the room, gripped her upper arm with incredibly strong fingers and led her to a chair. She slid gratefully onto the cane-bottom seat. Seth moved away, ran some water and came back with a glass.
“Drink this.”
She obeyed, gulping down the fresh well water in a vain attempt to cool the fire of adrenaline pumping through her blood at Mach-2 force. Fingers trembling against the glass humiliated and annoyed her. She was a confident woman, unflappable in an emergency. At the moment she was a mess.
Seth crouched in front of her chair, bringing with him the woodsy scent of outdoors. Head cocked to one side, he raked her face with hawklike scrutiny. His strong jaw flexed a couple of times and his nostrils flared. She wasn’t sure if he was furious or worried.
A few times over the years, she’d fantasized about seeing him again, but this was one scenario that hadn’t occurred to her. Not even close.
“You okay?” His voice had matured into a gravelly baritone, the gravel probably the result of yelling at people to get down or get their hands in the air. “I’m sorry if I scared you.”
If he’d scared her? Who was he kidding?
With a deep cleansing breath, she set the glass onto the tabletop and stiffened her spine. “If this is the way you say hello to old friends, I’d hate to be your enemy.”
The slightest glint of amusement lit his grass-green eyes. “Who said we were friends?”
His dark hair was cut short, but the springy waves that had given him fits in high school were still apparent. Here and there she spotted a single strand of silver amidst the black. She’d always liked his thick, wavy hair though he’d considered it too girly. She wondered if he still did and then inwardly laughed at herself. From wide, powerful shoulders to five-o’clock shadow, there was nothing girly about this new and mature Seth.
Off balance at noticing him at all, Kathryn fired back, “Too bad you never came into the E.R. when I was on duty. I would have stapled your smart mouth shut.”
He laughed then, a bark of sound that bounced off the tiny kitchen walls and straight into Kat’s memory. Seth had grown up tough, but in spite of his troubled home life, he’d been full of fun and laughter. Now she realized the behavior had probably been a coping mechanism. She hoped his adult life had given him real reasons for joy.
“Still the same snooty girl,” he said, which made her grin. She’d been focused, shy and studious, three qualities that some had mistaken for snobbery, including Seth at first.
He pushed to a stand, his six-foot frame towering above her, though she was not petite by any means. “So, how’ve you been, Kat?”
She didn’t want to tell him the truth. That the dreams she’d chased had turned to nightmares. “I was about to ask you the same thing.”
He scrubbed a hand over his face, and Kat caught the scratchy sound of day-old beard. “I’m okay. I like the ranger job. The offer came at a time when I was ready for a change.”
Though curious, she didn’t ask if the move had anything to do with his broken marriage. Too many years and tears had flowed by to ask such personal questions. “So you moved back home. I never would have expected that.”
He lifted a uniform-clad shoulder. “Seemed like a good idea after—” He hesitated, and then smooth as a swan on water, redirected the conversation. Regardless, Kat caught his drift. A divorce would have been doubly hard on a steadfast man like Seth.
“Is there a legitimate reason why you decided to break into my house today?” he asked. “Or can I assume the medical field doesn’t pay as well as rumored and you’ve taken to a life of crime.”
She raised both hands to shoulder height. “Am I being interrogated, Officer?”
One corner of Seth’s mouth kicked up, and Kat gave up trying not to notice how attractive he still was. Maybe even more so now. Where he’d been all planes and angles as a teenager, today he was muscular, fit and sturdy with not an ounce of fat on him.
“No interrogation necessary. I caught you red-handed.”
“Would you really have shot me?”
His dark eyes went flat and cold as all the frivolity left him. A shiver danced up Kat’s spine. Criminals must tremble at the sound of his name.
“Probably not, but we have been experiencing some break-ins lately.”
“Susan didn’t mention that.”
“I’ve tried to keep things low-key for the time being. They mostly break in, mess the place up, help themselves to the food and booze, if there is any. A couple of places lost some cash and prescription drugs.”
“That explains your jumpiness.”
“I wasn’t jumpy. If I had been, we would be having this conversation in an ambulance.”
“Ouch. You’re scaring me.”
“Someone needs to. Even if your brother-in-law handles most of the property on the lake, you shouldn’t be going into someone else’s house when they aren’t there.”
“I admit that was pretty stupid. But actually, this is my house and I came over to talk you out of it.”
“This is your cabin?” When she nodded, he pulled a chair around and straddled it, facing her. “Danny didn’t tell me.”
Danny knew the history between Kat and Seth. Maybe he’d thought to let sleeping dogs lie. “Would it have mattered?”
“Nah.” He shook his head. “Should it?”
“Nah,” she said imitating him. “But the lake ranger’s house is down near the public entrance. Why aren’t you living there?”
“The place needed renovations. The last ranger kind of let things go. After living there for a while, I made a deal with the town to have some work done. I pay for this one while they fix that one. And in my spare time I do as much of the work myself as I can.”
“Ahh. Well, since you only need a temporary place, I’m sure Danny can find you something suitable.”
He gave her a funny look. “This place suits me fine.”
“But I’m back and I want my house.”
“I have a lease.”
“For how long?”
“Longer than your vacation.”
“I’m not here on vacation.”
He jacked an eyebrow. “What does that mean?”
“I’ve moving back.”
An odd fire backlit his green, green eyes. A fire Kat could not interpret. “As in permanently?”
The familiar ache of indecision started up inside her head. She rubbed at her temples, confused and uncertain. Dr. Kathryn Elizabeth Thatcher was a highly skilled doctor who made decisions about other people’s lives all the time. Why couldn’t she figure out what to do with her own?
“Let’s just say I’m here for some much needed R and R while I figure out some things.”
“That’s what I figured. So why not stay with Susan?”
Why did everyone keep asking her that? “Remember the old saying that fish and friends stink in three days? I’ve been there four.”
Though she’d slept through most of them.
“Then ask Danny to find you a place.”
He was starting to tick her off.
“Seth,” she said as reasonably as possible. “I have a place. This place. Want to see the deed?”
“Want to see my lease agreement?”
“Why are you being so stubborn?”
“Why are you?”
“This is getting us nowhere.” With a huff, she jumped out of the chair and stalked to the long row of windows, gazed out at the breathtaking view for a moment and then turned to try again. “I’ll pay the rent on another cabin of your choosing.”
“I like it here.”
“I don’t remember you being this difficult.”
His jaw twitched and the fiery glint returned. “Time and experience changes a man, Kat. I’ve learned to fight a lot harder for the things I want.”
Surely he wasn’t referring to their long-ago relationship. They hadn’t seen each other for years, and the man had married someone else.
“It’s only a house, Seth. You can find another.”
“That’s what I keep telling you. Now if you don’t mind…” He let the sentence trail away in cool dismissal.
“You’re not going to give me back my cottage,” she said incredulously.
“Nope. I’m not.” He opened the front door and stood to one side. “Bye Kat. See you around.”
What else could she do? With one final, scathing glance, she gathered her dignity and left.
With a mix of admiration, amusement and regret, Seth watched Kathryn stalk off through the woods, straight brown hair swaying against her shoulders, long lean legs churning the ground with purpose.
That was Kat. Always on the go, always filled with purpose and aware of exactly what she wanted. A long time ago she’d wanted him, but she’d wanted to be a doctor much, much more.
He shook his head at the thoughts. He hadn’t seen Kathryn Thatcher in years. What did he know of her now?
Nothing. Not one thing other than she was still as pretty as an Easter lily and still had the uncanny ability to make him want to take care of her.
For one minute there, after he’d lowered the Glock 44 and while she gazed at him with shock and fear, he’d wanted to take her in his arms. For comfort purposes only, of course.
Kat. He hung his head for a moment and contemplated the wooden porch. Long ago he’d dealt with losing his first love, but seeing her again stirred some deep and elemental longing to set things right. They’d left a lot of business unfinished.
His conscience began to nag.
Finding Kathryn in his kitchen had been a shock he hadn’t been prepared for. He’d come in, guns blazing like some Wyatt Earp cowboy and scared her to death, but that hadn’t been enough for the big-city cop. Oh, no. He’d had to intentionally bait her about the cottage, too. He still hadn’t figured that one out yet.
He studied his reaction for a minute, wondering if, in some juvenile way, he wanted to hurt her. He didn’t. She had been hurt far more than he by their carelessness as teenagers. After the baby, they’d drifted apart, too guilt-ridden and ashamed to discuss what they both must have been feeling. He hadn’t understood the reaction then. All he’d understood was Kat’s abandonment.
He didn’t blame her for that. Maybe he once had, but not now. Interesting how fifteen minutes with Kat had resurrected a memory he’d buried for years.
From the local talk, he knew she had never married, never had more babies. He had. God had blessed him in a thousand ways, even if Rita had killed him and their marriage with her infidelity.
As a Christian he should have been able to make his marriage work, but he’d failed somehow. Failed Rita. Failed his daughter. Most of all he’d failed God, but he didn’t know what to do about it. Rita had been the one to file for divorce, and as hard as he’d tried to stop her, she’d divorced him anyway. Nothing much a man could do about that, Christian or not.
But in truth, their marriage had died long before the courthouse funeral. That was the part that haunted him.
Seth looked up, saw that Kat had disappeared from sight. Twilight hovered over the thick trees like a million black gnats.
Slowly he shut the door and went inside, chest heavy with emotion. Seeing Kat again had brought back all the questions.
He was thirty-six years old, divorced, alone, and still asking God why he’d been allowed to love two women in his life but hadn’t been enough to keep either of them.
Chapter Three
Kat slammed into the house, flip-flops thwacking against the gleaming hardwood floors. Susan had some explaining to do.
She couldn’t believe Seth Washington was living in her house. Seth. Of all people. Why hadn’t someone warned her?
She found Susan in the den, wrapping a gift for a baby shower at church. Her brother-in-law, golden-haired Danny, lay kicked back in his brown leather recliner watching a baseball game. Little Sadie, a dark-haired surprise in a very blond family, sprawled across her daddy’s lap feeding him roasted peanuts. Ten-year-old Jon played some kind of hand-held video game while Queenie the pregnant cat followed his rapid movements in fascination. Shelby was nowhere in sight and Kat figured the fourteen-year-old was upstairs talking on the telephone. Her sister’s family was about as all-American as they came.
When Kat entered the den, Susan glanced up with a smile.
“Hand me a blue bow, will you, Kat?” She indicated the coffee table and a plastic bag filled with a rainbow of colored gift bows.
Plastic and acetate rustled as Kat retrieved the needed decoration. Normally she’d ask about the gift, but right now she had more important things on her mind.
“Why didn’t you tell me Seth Washington had rented my cottage?”
Her sister carefully creased the ends of baby-print paper and taped them down before speaking.
“I wondered where you had gone off to.”
Kat clapped the bow into Susan’s outstretched hand. “He almost shot me.”
Susan froze, hand still outstretched. The recliner mechanism popped loudly as Danny sprang upward. “What?”
She told them about the incident, finishing with, “As soon as he recognized me, he lowered the pistol, but he scared twenty years off my life.”
“Seth’s, too, no doubt. What on earth possessed you to go into the cabin?”
“It was one of those spur-of-the-moment things. And the cottage is my house.” But she was feeling more foolish with each passing minute. Her quick decisions in the E.R. were always right on. Snap judgments in life weren’t quite as successful.
Susan’s usual smile was replaced with a frown. “You worry me sometimes, Kat. All those brains and not a lick of sense.”
Kat bristled at the taunt her family had thrown at her all her life. No one had said it in years.
“Susan,” Danny chided gently. “That’s not fair.”
Susan’s shoulders slumped. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I should have told you about Seth.”
At her sister’s sweet apology, the tension dissipated but the words hovered in the back of Kat’s mind, painful because she feared they were true. “Yes, you should have, but going into the house was stupid. I should have realized nothing good could come of it.”
“But you did see Seth again—finally. I know how you’ve dreaded that initial contact.”
Susan was right—again—though Kat didn’t like being so transparent. “I wasn’t exactly dreading anything. I’ve just been too busy to seek out a virtual stranger from the past.”
Too busy sleeping and avoiding life.
Susan gave her a look that said she didn’t believe a word, but she returned to her package without argument. “So how does he look to you?”
Kat wasn’t about to mention Seth’s stunning green eyes rimmed in spiky black lashes or how the little creases beside his mouth, deeper now, still made her stomach flutter.
“Medically, he seems healthy enough.”
Danny made a choking sound as he settled back into his recliner. “Talk about taking the wind out of a man’s sails. I hope Seth never hears that summation.”
Kat started to make some smart remark about men all being the same as long they had health insurance, but she figured her cynical outlook wouldn’t be appreciated.
“I asked him to move out of my house.”
Susan zipped off a strip of Scotch tape. “Don’t you think that’s a little selfish? Come on, Kat, if you don’t want to stay here, there are other places to live until Seth moves into the ranger’s house.”
“I have a couple of vacant cottages that aren’t booked if you’re interested,” Danny offered. “You’ve always liked that secluded little cabin near Dock Nine. We’ve been doing some renovations, but the place is livable.”
He didn’t bother to mention what Kat already knew. The cabin was a stone’s throw from her own A-frame, the one occupied by her former beau. If she moved there—something she’d have to think about—seeing Seth occasionally would be inevitable.
Oh, what was she thinking? If she stayed in Wilson’s Cove for any length of time, she was bound to run into him now and then.
Fine. She could handle seeing Seth Washington. What happened all those years ago shouldn’t matter now. Don’t talk about it. Don’t think about it and everything will be fine.
Susan came around the table to where Kat had plopped onto the fluffy faux-suede couch to think. She set the pretty wrapped package between them.
“We could sew new curtains and maybe slipcovers for the furniture. Fixing the place up could be fun. What do you say, sis? The Thatcher sisters together again, like old times.”
Like old times. She and Susan had once been joined at the hip, but in the past ten years, Kat’s work had stolen their time together. She’d thought she was the only one affected, but Susan had missed her, too. A powerful homesickness welled inside along with the bald truth that she was wrong to expect Seth to move out of the cabin just because she had come back to Wilson’s Cove.
Maybe Seth had been more right than she realized. Maybe she was a snooty girl.
And she’d tell him so the next time they crossed paths.
Three days later, Kat, dressed in blue shorts and white T-shirt, knelt on the back deck of her slightly dilapidated new rental potting scarlet geraniums and contemplating what to do with the rest of her life. If she’d thought time spent here in Wilson’s Cove would take away the emptiness inside, she’d been sorely mistaken. She felt as adrift and lost in this place of her upbringing as she had in Oklahoma City.
So often she wished her parents had lived longer, though Susan had always been her confidant. Still, a mother’s shoulder and wise counsel, even to someone as old as she, sounded good right now.
Yet she hadn’t leaned on her mother when she’d needed her most. She hadn’t leaned on anyone but herself. She’d made the mess and she’d been determined to deal with it on her own. She’d hidden her secret well, too. No one had ever even suspected that the quiet, church-going Thatcher girl had gotten pregnant.
She sighed and shook her head. Why had all these memories started to torment her again?
Maybe she was clinically depressed. The question was why?
She was a successful, well-respected physician. She had friends. She had things. She had money. Why did life feel like one big disappointment?
Holding a single geranium upright in a small pot, she dug the fingers of one hand into the cool, moist potting soil. Susan insisted that flowers around the cabin would add character to the place.
If she knew her sister, planting flowers was intended as therapy for her as well.
The rental was smaller and older than her A-frame but neatly furnished with all the necessities. The property also boasted an old fishing dock right on the lake, though Kat didn’t feel too confident about the dock’s stability.
At some recent time Susan had added her touch to the bedroom, dappling on wall paint to create the look of faux leather. The pale tan was more suitable to a weekend fisherman, but the decor would do until Seth moved into the ranger’s house. Whenever that happened.
The best thing about finding a new place to live was that the activity took her mind off her real problems. She’d finally turned her cell phone on this morning and discovered twenty-three messages from the medical director. He wasn’t the least bit worried, or so he said, about the frivolous lawsuit, and he’d cover her shifts for a few weeks until she was ready to come back. The leave of absence was just that, he insisted, a leave. He refused to believe she’d even consider resigning. He was wrong.
“Take a break. Get some rest,” Dr. Beckham said when she had dialed him up. “Then get your tail back to work. We need you.”
They’d haggled for twenty minutes, but he’d been adamant, and in the end she’d agreed. In all honesty, she didn’t want to consider going back, though she hadn’t told the director as much. She shuddered in dread at the thought of facing another ambulance filled with broken bodies while some ambulance-chasing lawyer stood in the waiting area ready to file suit because she wasn’t God.
Whether here or there, life stunk.
“You look serious.”
At the sound of that familiar gravelly voice, Kat jerked around and nearly lost her balance. At the sight of Seth Washington, she nearly lost her breath.
Lean and fit in his blue-gray ranger’s uniform, dark hair glistening in the sunlight, Seth sauntered across the lush green grass. Susan was right. He looked good in that uniform.
Kathryn patted dirt around the droopy little flower before rising to her feet. “You have a habit of sneaking up on people.”
“Haven’t you heard? Good cops walk softly and carry big guns.” Seth propped an elbow on the wobbly wooden porch railing, his eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses, his grin doing funny things to her concentration. Not that she was concentrating on anything too earth shattering.
“Still mad?” he asked.
For effect and to stop the crazy thoughts running through her head, she glared at him. “Yes.”
After a beat of silence she laughed. “Not really. I just wanted to see your reaction. In fact, I want to apologize.”
He arched a very dark eyebrow. “For?”
“Breaking and entering. Conduct unbecoming. Rude behavior.”
“You were surprised. No big deal.”
“You were surprised, too, but you didn’t get angry.”
“No, but I pointed a loaded gun at you. That would make me a bit testy.”
“Stop being easy on me. I was a brat and I’m sorry.”
“You’ve always been a brat, but I like you, anyway.”
He’d said like as in the present tense. Could he really not hate her?
“I came to apologize to you,” he said. “I was rude.”
He made himself at home on her steps, crossing his ankles and leaning an elbow on the rough planks. A cell phone dangled at his hip instead of a weapon and a shiny badge glinted over his shirt pocket. He looked relaxed and comfy, a lot like the teenage boy she’d once known.
“Does that mean you’re willing to give me back my cabin?”
He made a noise, half chuckle, half scoff. “Nope. ’Fraid not.”
“That’s what I figured. Go away.” But she smiled when she said it.
“Can’t do that, either.” He removed the dark glasses and hung them on the edge of his shirt pocket while he studied her with a thoughtful gaze. “I really do want to apologize. I had no right to be rude to an old friend.”
“Apology accepted.”
“So does that mean we can be friends again?”
Friends? Could she be friends with a man whose presence brought back the most agonizing time in her life?
The memory rose between them, hovering like a red wasp waiting to sting. Did he feel it, too? Or was she the only one who still battled the guilt?
Maybe men weren’t affected in the same way a woman was. Maybe he’d moved on and forgotten. Maybe he’d never been filled with the same sense of guilt and shame.
And just maybe the time had come for her to stop thinking this way.
An expert at compartmentalizing, Kat pushed the thoughts down deep. She would always care about the boy she’d known in high school, but she wouldn’t open the painful Pandora’s box that had been their relationship.
Still she wanted to know how he’d been, if he’d been happy, if all his other dreams had come true.
“I heard you were divorced.” The thought, half-formed, had become words before she could think better of saying them.
He blanched, and some of his ease disappeared. He stared out at the serene lake, his face in profile, serious and rugged and maybe even a bit tragic.
Kat wished she’d kept her mouth shut. No one walked away from a divorce unscathed.
After a painful beat of silence in which Kat tried to think of a way to take back her unfortunate words, Seth released a gusty breath. “Two years later I’m still in shock.”
“Unfortunately, divorce happens.” All the time, from what she’d seen, but she felt bad that a broken home had happened to Seth. He’d suffered enough of that as a teenager.
“Not to me. I don’t believe in divorce. I hate it, hate even saying the words.”
So Susan had been right. “So I guess that means the split wasn’t your idea.”
“No.” The word was flat and hopeless. “Not my idea, but probably my fault. Cops don’t always make the best husbands.”
“I’m sure you did the best you could.” The words were platitudes even to her ears.
“I did. That’s the agony of the thing. We had a Christian home, a Christian marriage. Or so I thought. All the time, Rita was going through the motions, playing church but seeing someone else on the side. I was a fool without a clue. Not a single clue until I came home from shift one morning to find her lover drinking coffee in my kitchen. They wanted to tell me together.”
Emotion darkened his light-green eyes to the color of grass. His ex-wife had wounded him terribly. No surprise there. Seth was the sticking kind. The surprise was that he’d become a Christian.
Instinctively, as she often did with patients, Kat reached out and placed her hand over his. Seth’s skin was warm and masculine tough against her fingertips. “What an awful thing to do to you. I’m sorry, Seth. Truly.”
“Me, too, Doc.” He gave her a lopsided grin and carefully slid his hand from beneath hers and rubbed at his smooth-shaven jaw. The action was intentional, Kat was sure, his way of letting her know that he did not welcome her touch. “But a broken marriage is something even a good doctor can’t fix.”
“I know.” She folded her fingers into a fist.
This was the frustration of being a doctor. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t fix everything. And there were always people who couldn’t accept that fact, including her.
Her visitor gave the porch railing a shake. The old wood wobbled like a bobble-headed doll.
“I can, however, fix this for you.” He nodded toward the rickety old fishing dock projecting out into the lapping water. “And that, too.”
“Feeling guilty about stealing my house?”
“Maybe a little, though dock inspection and repair is part of my job. Safety on the lake, first and foremost. Fix it or tear it down.”
“Doesn’t matter to me.” Nothing much did these days. “I really don’t care one way or the other.”
“The next renter might. I’ll fix it.” He slid the sunglasses back into place. “You sound a little down. Everything okay?”
Like she was going to tell him all her troubles. “I’m fine.”
He didn’t look as if he believed her but he had the grace not to say so. “Well, I guess I better get moving. There’s always work to do on the lake.”
“Not to mention the fact that you’re the only thing resembling law enforcement in Wilson’s Cove.”
“That, too. But I don’t mind. Policing both the town and the lake was part of the deal when they hired me. I’m more cop than I am lake ranger, anyway.”
“The county sheriff has always taken care of Wilson Cove.”
“That was before the lake grew so popular. Sheriff Trout has an entire county to cover with four men.”
Not to mention he was stationed thirty miles away in Henderson. “Any luck with finding out who’s responsible for the recent break-ins?”
“Not yet. Nothing’s been reported for a couple of weeks so maybe the perps were short-term visitors. But just in case, keep things secured and be alert.”
She’d worked in an inner city for years. A physician knew about secure and alert.
She tilted her head in a teasing smile. He sounded so incredibly macho. “Will do, Officer.”
“I mean it, Kathryn. You’re a woman alone. If you should need me…”
“I know where you live.” She couldn’t resist saying, “In my house.”
Some of his seriousness left and he shook his head in amusement. “Still the same sassy mouth.” He slapped the top of the railing, said, “And I’ll be back to work on the dock as soon as I can.”
She’d try not to be here. She didn’t say that, either. But being near Seth resurrected too many memories. She was depressed enough as it was.
“Thanks.”
“So, I guess I’ll see you at church on Sunday?”
“Church?” Her conscience pinched. She hadn’t been to church in years. Hadn’t even thought about going.
“Does that surprise you? That I go to church now?”
She tilted her head to one side. A robin swooped to the ground beside the porch and nabbed a worm.
“A little.”
“All those times you talked about your faith finally soaked in,” Seth said. “I took a while to get the message, but the first time I looked down the wrong end of a nine millimeter and came out alive, I promised God then and there to follow Him. I wouldn’t have survived the last couple of years without Him.”
One of the few things they’d fought about as teens was Seth’s lack of a relationship with God. Somewhere along the way, while she’d been losing her faith, Seth had discovered his.
The irony wasn’t lost on Kathryn, but it was a bitter pill to swallow.
The gentle breeze stirred, sending a lock of hair into her eyes. Her hands were so dirty, she left it.
“So what do you say?” Seth pushed the curl aside and leaned in, green eyes aflame, lips tilted. “See you Sunday morning? Ten-thirty? If you’re nice, I’ll let you sit by me.”
The brush of his hand against her cheek warmed Kathryn more than the seventy-degree day. And that was neither good nor acceptable. She backed away, breaking contact as he’d done earlier.
“I appreciate the invitation, Seth. Really. But I won’t be coming to church.”
A slight frown puckered his dark, slashing eyebrows. “Why not? Don’t want to sit by me? Or are you already heading back to OKC?”
“I don’t know an easy way to say this.” A knot formed beneath her breast bone, like a hand squeezing her heart, but he might as well hear the truth directly from her so he wouldn’t be asking. “I don’t go to church anymore, Seth.”
He stilled, alert and watchful. “Care to explain that a little better?”
Explain? How did she explain what she didn’t understand herself?
Even through the sunglasses, his gaze bored into her, earnest and concerned. She didn’t want his concern. She didn’t want anything from him.
Turning her head, she stared out over the silvery lake. In the far corner of a nearby cove, a single boat bobbed above the gentle current. The soft murmur of voices, sprinkled with laughter, carried across the water. The scene was a happy one. Serene. Peaceful.
Kathryn couldn’t feel that peace, hadn’t felt peace in a long time.
“Somewhere along the line I lost my faith,” she said to the wind, though she could feel the intensity of Seth’s gaze burning a hole in her conscience. “I wish I still believed that God was the answer to everything. I wish I believed He cared. But the truth is, Seth,” she said, swinging her gaze to finally meet his, “I don’t believe in anything at all.”
Chapter Four
Lost her faith. Kat’s bald statement rolled round and round inside Seth’s head as he drove along the lake’s edge checking for problems and then into town.
Kat no longer believed in God? He couldn’t take it in. All through high school her Christian stand had impressed him. So much so that he’d carried the seed of her witness to Houston and ultimately to a relationship with the Lord.
What could have happened to steal Kat’s faith?
A sick foreboding started low in his belly and climbed, full grown, into his mind.
He pulled the truck into the slanted parking spot in front of O’Grady’s Hardware Store and killed the motor. Hands gripping the steering wheel, he squeezed his eyes closed and huffed a painful sigh.
Today he’d gone to Kathryn’s to apologize and maybe to be a friend. He wanted nothing else from her. In fact, he never wanted anything from any woman again except friendship. Not with his track record. Somehow he’d destroyed his marriage and let God down. And a long time ago he’d failed Kathryn.
The reckless kid he’d been back then had blamed her as much as himself. Maybe more. She was the one who had ultimately walked away, who wanted a career in medicine more than anything else, including him. He’d resented that so much.
But now he wondered. Had the wounds they’d inflicted on each other caused her to question God?
The only sensible answer was yes.
He was the reason Kathryn no longer believed. Because of what he’d done, what he’d caused her to do, seventeen years ago.
“Lord, I could use a little guidance here,” he murmured. “I’ve messed things up again.”
He made the same confession a lot lately.
When his prayer brought no immediate answer, he exited the truck, habitually snicking the locks. Half the people in Wilson’s Cove still didn’t lock their cars or houses, a worrisome practice he was trying to change.
For the most part, the sleepy little town experienced few crimes and the townsfolk were convinced no one would steal from them personally. Summer people, they claimed, caused all the trouble, pointing to the rise in problems from Memorial Day to Labor Day. After years of working the streets of Houston, Seth might be cynical, but safety first was not a clichГ©.
As he stepped up on the sidewalk, he was greeted by passersby who called him by name and asked how he was doing. This was one of his favorite things about moving back to Wilson’s Cove. Here he had a name, a dozen people he called close friends and many more acquaintances, folks he’d known all his life. Though years and miles had separated them, the town embraced him again as soon as he declared his intent to stay. He’d never leave here again, ever. He was home and this was where he wanted to live out his life. Nothing could drag him away again.
His single status was the object of the town’s gossips, but he didn’t mind much. In a town this size, talking about each other was the major source of entertainment. As long as the conversation remained truthful, no one was hurt. Anyway, that was his way of thinking.
He appreciated the motherly ladies, too, who handed him foil-wrapped lasagna and slices of homemade pie or invited him to dinner after church each Sunday. Many of them had known his mother during the hard times and seemed to enjoy spoiling Virgie Washington’s boy. Life was good here in Wilson’s Cove, and as the only law-enforcement official for miles around, Seth planned to keep it that way.
This was one of the reasons the break-ins worried him so much. Four in less than two months, all on weekends, which led him to suspect lake weekenders or their kids. Other than a few unidentifiable tire tracks and nonregistered fingerprints, he had exactly zero evidence.
As he scraped open the door to O’Grady’s Hardware, Seth sniffed wood shavings and motor oil and a hint of this morning’s coffee left on the burner too long. The scents were a step back in time. O’Grady’s had been here as long as Seth could remember and sold everything from tools and car parts to wood stoves and burial policies. The latter had never struck a single soul as an odd thing for a hardware store to sell.
“What can I do for you today, Seth?” Jim Green, the mustached clerk, asked. The two men had gone to high school together and played on the football team. Even now, Jim was as big and burly as an offensive lineman. “Need more insulation for that ceiling?”
“Lumber today, Jim. I have a couple of docks to repair.”
“The town’s getting its money’s worth out of you, isn’t it?” Jim asked with a grin.
“I hope so. Wouldn’t want them to fire me.”
“No chance of that happening.” Before Seth could swell with the compliment, Jim finished with, “Who else would take a job in this place?”
Maybe no one, but Seth was thankful for the opportunity just the same. If he’d stayed in Houston, he wasn’t sure what might have happened. He’d definitely lost his edge after the divorce, one thing an inner-city cop could not afford to do.
He handed the man his list and began to move around the store, picking up the things he needed while Jim took care of the items in the lumberyard.
He was standing next to the paint samples, a can of weather retardant in one hand when the old door of the hardware store, swelled with spring humidity, scraped open against the concrete floor. Seth glanced up as Susan Renfro entered. She spotted him immediately.
“Hey, Seth. I thought that was your truck out there. How ya been?”
“All right. You?”
“Fat and sassy.” She laughed and stepped up to the racks of paint swatches. “Emphasis on fat.”
Seth smiled. He’d always liked Kat’s sister, and even though she’d gained a few pounds, he thought she was still one of the prettiest women in the Cove. “I saw Kat this morning.”
Her grin turned to curiosity. “Really? I don’t see any blood. Didn’t she whop you upside the head for renting her cabin?”
“I think she’s over being mad. At least, I hope she is.” He picked up a paint stick, adding the wooden paddle to his collection of odds and ends. “She told me she doesn’t go to church anymore.”
Susan studied a paper strip with varying shades of brown. “Not in a long time. I’m surprised she told you.”
“Guess she didn’t have much choice. I asked if she’d be at church Sunday.”
Kat’s sister arched a brown eyebrow. “Bet that went over well.”
Not particularly. He’d felt the invisible wall rise between them as soon as he’d asked.
“What’s that all about, Suz? Kat’s faith is the reason I’m a Christian today. How could she stop believing?”
“I wish I knew. She went off to college and the next thing I know, she’s refusing to attend church.” She frowned. “Come to think of it, she stopped going to church before leaving for college.”
That’s what Seth was afraid of. His stomach fell to the toe of his boots and stayed there. Here was his answer. Kat had left the faith because of him. Rita had claimed the same thing. She even said she’d faked being a Christian to make him happy. He, Seth Washington, had caused two women to lose trust in God.
Wasn’t he special?
Susan thrust a strip of pale browns beneath his nose. “Which of these do you like best?”
What did he know? Brown was brown.
“That one,” he said, putting his finger on a medium shade in the center of the card.
“Terrific. I like chamois, too.”
Chamois was a color? He’d thought it was a cloth for polishing his truck.
While he pondered that bit of information, Susan switched gears on him. “We need to help her.”
“Who?”
She looked at him as though he’d been struck with a sudden onset of attention deficit. “Kat, of course.”
His belly did that sinking thing again.
He was all for helping people. To serve and protect, that was his motto, but he wasn’t sure Kat would appreciate the interference. “How?”
“She’s depressed. Didn’t you notice? I guess I shouldn’t be telling you this, but I thought…” Her voice trailed off, though Seth figured he knew where she was heading. And he didn’t much like the direction.
“I noticed she seemed down.” Kat had lost her sparkle, her confidence.
“She is. She’s being sued for some stupid thing and thinks she wants to leave medicine for good.”
Seth held back a disparaging sound. “She won’t do that.”
He knew better. Kat wouldn’t give up the career she loved. She wouldn’t stay in Wilson’s Cove. She might be tired and need a vacation among hometown folks, but that’s all it was—a vacation.
“I don’t think so, either, but I’m worried about her.” Susan raised a yellow color sample up to the light. “Why don’t you come for supper tonight and we’ll talk?”
Talk? About Kat? No, he didn’t think so.
The hardware clerk, sweat on his upper lip, traipsed down an aisle toward them. “Got your stuff together, Seth. Pull around in back when you’re ready.”
“Will do. Add these to the tab, will you?” He handed off the armload of supplies and waited for Jim to start back to the register before saying to Susan, “I’m not sure Kat would be happy to be the topic of this conversation.”
“Kat’s not happy about anything, anyway.”
But she was a private person who wouldn’t appreciate her sister’s interference. “Why are you telling me this?”
Susan lifted one shoulder. “Because she won’t listen to me. She gets her back up whenever I mention God or church.”
“That’s too bad, Susan. Seriously, but I don’t understand where I come into the picture. Kat and I don’t even know each other.”
“But you were once close.”
Yes, too close. Close enough to break each other’s hearts and change the course of their lives. He refused to let his mind go in that direction.
“I’m sure she has close friends today, probably even a boyfriend. Why not talk to them about this?”
“Number one,” Susan tapped a paint card against her fingers as she ticked off the reasons. “Kat isn’t currently seeing anyone. Number two, I don’t know any of her friends. And number three, you just expressed concern about Kat’s lost faith. I thought you’d be interested.”
Right. He had asked. And he was interested. He just wasn’t sure getting personally involved was a good idea.
“It’s only supper, Seth. You haven’t been over in weeks. And if you don’t want to discuss Kat, that’s fine. We can have supper and a good visit. We’d love to have you.”
“All right, then. Supper sounds good. I need to talk to Danny about a couple of old dilapidated cabins east of the marina, anyway. What time?”
“Shelby has piano after school. Let’s make dinner around six, okay?”
“I’ll be there.”
A man had to eat, and Susan Renfro was the best cook in the county. Kat didn’t have to be part of the equation. In fact, he’d make sure Kat was not part of the equation. There were some mistakes a man did not want to repeat.
He’d been set up.
Anyway, the casual evening at Susan’s felt like a setup to Seth.
He’d been sitting in Danny Renfro’s living room, enjoying a friendly argument about baseball. He liked Danny. Everyone did. Tall and so blond the guys in school had called him “surfer boy,” Susan’s husband had enough personality to sell raincoats in the dessert. His real estate success surprised no one, though he’d gotten a good start by marrying a girl whose family had once owned the lake and all the land around it.
Susan had been in the kitchen, creating something that smelled so delicious Seth’s bachelor stomach whimpered in anticipation.
Thirty minutes into a relaxing evening, the front door opened and Kat walked in.
For a few seconds Seth was transported back to a time when he’d eagerly waited here in this very room for Kat to come bounding down the stairs, ready for a Saturday-night date.
More interested in books than being popular, Kat had never been a fashion diva, but she always looked good to him. Tonight she was dressed in capris—or whatever women called those short pants—and a pink shirt. She looked as she had in high school, fresh and pretty.
Her long brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail. Simple. Clean. Neat. Very like the girl he remembered. She was curvier now, a change he appreciated, though he probably shouldn’t be noticing.
Back in high school, Susan had been Miss Popularity, the outgoing cheerleader type while Kat had stayed in the background, quietly plotting her future.
At the time, he’d expected that future to include him. Of course, it hadn’t.
Young and cocky and in love, his heart had always accelerated the moment he locked eyes on her.
His heart accelerated tonight, but for different reasons. He wasn’t quite sure, however, what those reasons were.
Kat, too, must have been taken unawares because as soon as she saw him, she paused. Only a beat, but he noticed.
The trip down memory lane was broken by that infinitesimal beat of time. This was not the Kat he’d known. And he was no longer that love-struck boy.
“Seth,” she said. “I didn’t know you were coming.”
“Same here.”
Kat looked from him to Susan who had appeared in the doorway between the kitchen and living room.
“Kat, honey.” Susan, cheeks rosy from the heat, sounded a bit too chipper. “Come help me get supper on the table.”
With that, she plucked Kat’s shirtsleeve and guided her into the kitchen. Quiet, undecipherable conversation rose amidst the clamor of plates and pots and kitchen appliances.
“My wife up to something?” Danny asked.
The two men sat facing each other, the muted television flashing pictures of the evening news and weather. Danny held the remote in one hand, waiting for the sports report.
Seth gazed at the now-empty doorway. “I hope not.”
“Don’t hold it against her if she is. She means well. She worries about Kat.”
“She told me.”
“And you’re wondering why she’s dragging you into the fray?”
“Something like that.”
“Can’t say for sure, but I know this much. After their parents died in that wreck, Susan felt responsible for Kat, being the big sister and all. If Kat’s not happy, Susan wants to fix the problem, make things right.”
He remembered that about Susan. Any time he and Kat had had a disagreement, big sister had been the mediator trying to get them back together. She must have been bewildered in those last months when Kat and Seth drifted apart, too broken to repair.
“Then there’s the history between you and Kat. Suzie’s a romantic.”
A shudder of dread ran down Seth’s spine. He sat up straighter. “Spare me that.”
“You’re both single. Why not?”
None of your business, he wanted to say, but this was life in a small town. Everyone stuck his nose in everyone else’s business.
“As you said, we have history. Friends, yes. Anything else, uh-uh.” His lousy track record spoke for itself. “I’m sure Kat would say the same.”
The woman in question chose that moment to come out of the kitchen. “Dinner is on. You guys wash up.”
Susan stepped up beside Kat. Seth couldn’t help noticing the differences in the two women were more than physical. An ever-present joy shone from Susan’s blue eyes while Kat looked tense and a little sad.
Susan yelled up the staircase, “Kids! Supper. Sadie, put that cat outside.” She pulled a face at Seth. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to break your eardrums.”
Seth grinned back. Susan was as likable as her husband.
After a trip to the sink, Seth joined the Renfros at the big family-style table. A feast was laid out before them.
“Seth, you sit here.” Susan said, indicating a place beside the only boy child, Jon. Kat was already seated on the other side of the table with Shelby at one elbow and an empty space at the other. “I hope you like pork tenderloin and mushroom gravy.”
He slid the napkin into his lap. “A man alone likes anything he doesn’t have to cook or buy at a restaurant, but this looks and smells amazing.”
Little Sadie climbed into the chair beside her aunt. Kat scooted the child closer to the table and, with an indulgent smile, handed her a napkin.
“Bow your heads, kids,” Danny said and waited until the room was quiet before giving thanks.
Though glad for the food and the friendship, Seth ached with a renewed sense of loss. His own family, though much smaller, had once shared this same routine.
He opened his eyes to take in the picture of what a Christian family was meant to be. Kat sat, eyes open, staring down at her plate. She must have felt his stare because she looked up.
The old Kat would have winked or made a face. This one gave a cynical twist of her lips that made him sad.
After the prayer, an abundance of food moved in an orderly fashion around the table. Fresh radishes and wilted leaf lettuce from Susan’s garden. Fluffy mashed potatoes and buttery hot rolls.
Conversation flowed around the table with the food, easy and comfortable. Talk of the lake, the town, the high school baseball team. Seth relaxed and joined in, as did Kat. The evening was turning out better than he’d expected.
In fact, he found himself waiting for the times when Kat would comment and listening for the things that made her laugh. Kat didn’t laugh as much as she used to, but when she did, the sound was rich and throaty and came from her heart.
Kat had a big heart.
Or she once did. What did he know of her now?
And why couldn’t he stop thinking about her, stop watching her, stop waiting for those times when their gazes collided? Susan and her innuendoes had gotten to him.
Eventually, the conversation turned to the break-ins, something he could sink his teeth into. Anything to stop thinking about the woman who’d jilted him.
“Any news on that front, Seth?” Danny asked.
Seth shook his head. The episodes were troubling but not violent. Still, he wanted to see an end to them. “I sent the fingerprints from the Millers’ house to the state lab, but there was no record found.”
“Figures,” Kat said. “If kids are responsible, their prints wouldn’t be recorded in the state files.”
“I think our vandals are weekenders,” Susan added as she passed Seth another roll. “The trouble always happens on weekends.”
Seth didn’t bother to point out that kids had more free time on weekends, too, even though he tended to agree with her assessment that someone other than locals was responsible. Anyway, he hoped so.
“Jeremy Fisher’s dad said he’ll shoot anyone who tries to break in to the bait shop,” young Jon said. “He bought a new pistol up in Henderson.”
Seth glanced down at the boy with a look of concern. They didn’t need a citizenry up in arms. Most folks in this part of the country owned at least one gun, mostly for hunting, but a lethal weapon nonetheless.
“I hope you’ll discourage that kind of talk,” he said to Danny. “It’s dangerous.”
Danny nodded. “I certainly will, but you have to know lots of folks are talking, not just Ken Fisher.”
Seth knew all right, and the talk worried him.
He picked up a knife to butter his roll and said, “I was hoping to have this thing solved before Alicia arrives. Looks like that’s not going to happen.”
His daughter’s visit was an amazing turn of events, considering the fact that he’d had to fight Rita for every visitation in the past. Now she was letting Alicia come to Wilson’s Cove for the entire summer.
“Alicia?” Susan asked, a forkful of potatoes halfway to her mouth.
He nodded. “My daughter. She lives in Houston with her mother.”
“And she’s coming here?” The teenage Shelby’s eyes lit up. “How old is she?”
“Fourteen.”
“Cool,” Shelby said, her braces flashing. “Way, way cool. I’m fourteen, too. Maybe we can hang out and I’ll show her around.”
The offer warmed him. Shelby was a nice kid. With her as a friend, Alicia would meet the right kids. “I’d appreciate that. Thanks.”
“No problem. New people keep summer from being so boring.”
Both her parents laughed. Seth grinned. He’d heard the “boredom” complaint from Alicia.
“I don’t think anyone ever mentioned that you have a daughter,” Susan was saying.
“What?” He pretended shock. “The ladies at the Quick Mart missed out on a piece of information? I thought they knew everything about everyone.”
The table chuckled again and conversation moved to the two sisters, Donna and Sharon who collected information in the same way other women collected recipes. If you wanted to know about sickness or funerals or new babies or romances, Sharon or Donna had the scoop.
Amused by the topic, Seth glanced across the table at Kat. Eyes down, she pushed her lettuce from one side of the plate to the other. She must have felt his gaze because she looked up. What Seth saw in her expression both puzzled and concerned him.
A few minutes ago, she’d been laughing. Now she looked stunned.
“Kat?” he said quietly. The others, in a friendly argument over the last hot roll didn’t seem to notice.
She shook her head and forced a smile. But he was trained to read body language. He saw.
Something had disturbed her.
Was it him? Had his casually tossed comments about Alicia come as a surprise?
Hadn’t she known he had a child?
He held her gaze as realization dawned.
She hadn’t known.
And even after all this time, Kat still grieved.
Chapter Five
Seth had a daughter.
After a restless night, Kathryn awoke with that one thought in mind. All morning as she’d been puttering around the house looking for something to do, she kept thinking of that moment when Seth had mentioned Alicia.
The news should not have come as surprise. He’d been married for some time. Having kids was almost a given these days. But for some reason the knowledge that Seth had sired another child brought all the memories tumbling in upon her like an avalanche.
She never thought about that terrible episode of her life. Hadn’t thought about it in years. What had happened was over, done and behind her. She’d moved on. Seth had moved on. They were both successful people with good lives. She’d gotten over the loss long ago.
Her frazzled state of mind and uneven sleep had nothing to do with their secret.
Then why was she shocked by the news that Seth had a daughter?
Maybe being back in Wilson’s Cove was the problem. Memories waited around every corner. Some good, some bad. Then there was Seth. He not only looked better than ever, he was a great guy. Everyone in town raved about him.
Maybe she shouldn’t have come.
Right. But where else could she go?
She picked up the certified letter she’d been reading and tapped the paper against her forehead.
Here was part of the reason she’d come home to Wilson’s Cove and why she’d stay. She was tired of the rat race because the rats were winning.
Last night Danny had told her about several available business ventures. Wilson’s Cove was growing and if she was smart, she could find a new business to throw all her energies into. That’s what she needed. A new project, a sense of purpose here in her hometown surrounded by family and friends. Then the depression would lift and she’d be happy. At the moment, she felt restless and useless. A new project was just what the doctor ordered.
Pushing aside the rest of the day’s mail, Kat opened her laptop and typed in the password to a medical site available only to licensed physicians. Research was her escape, her solace, her fascination. For the past couple of months she’d been studying necrotizing fasciitis, better known as “flesh-eating disease.”
That was the exciting thing about the medical field. There was always more to learn, and researching took her mind off everything else.
She was deeply focused on a fascinating case, taking notes like mad, when the sound of a hammer broke through.
Sitting back, she rubbed her eyes, then glanced at the tiny clock in the corner of the computer screen. Unreal. She’d been at work for more than two hours.
The hammer rang out again and she pushed up from the chair and followed the noise. As soon as she stepped out on the back porch, she spotted him. Seth, dressed in an ancient pair of jeans and a white T-shirt stood in the warm sunshine working on the rickety old fishing dock.
In spite of the uncomfortable history between her and Seth, she’d enjoyed last night’s dinner at Susan’s, and if she was truthful, she’d liked catching up with Seth. He’d told tales of being a street cop in Houston, some funny, some sad. Through the stories she’d gotten a glimpse of who Seth Washington had become.
And she couldn’t help liking him all over again. After all, he wasn’t to blame about what happened. She was. And if his presence brought back the guilt, maybe she deserved the punishment.
Going back inside the cabin, Kat poured them both a glass of tea and started out once more.
The warm sun blinded her and she squinted against the glare. Barefoot, she crossed the thick green grass—the tickle against her tender feet pleasant after years on concrete and tile—and started down the slight incline toward the dock.
As she drew closer, she watched the concentration on Seth’s face, noticed the muscles of his shoulders bunch with effort as he yanked away a rotting board. From a physician’s perspective, he was a fit and healthy male. From a woman’s perspective, he was a ruggedly attractive man.
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